Living in the tension between my dreams and my family’s needs
In a recent essay entitled, “How I Moved On From My What Not To Wear Style,” Stacy London, of TLC's What Not To Wear fame, grapples with the reality—both the freedoms and limitations—of growing older. She rose to fame as she dished out fashion advice to others. Now, at 47 years old, she couldn’t care less about following the fashion rules she once vigorously touted. At the same time, she realizes that age and experience dictate she not wear clothes or live a life that do not fit who she has become. Because she is aging, she contends that the clothing she donned in her 20s and 30s is no longer appropriate at 47. The same holds true for her lifestyle, she says. She writes: “What has happened is I've had to let go of the age when all things were possible (32) and started to look at what is (47).”
There's a sort of grief in her admission.
Although it doesn’t appear that London and I have much in common, I identify with the existential tension and grief she is experiencing. I, too, am starting to grapple with the reality that not everything I dream of is possible given my age and particular family circumstances. As I approach 39, I have dreams that have yet to materialize. And to tell the truth, at this point, I am not sure they ever will.
For close to a decade, I've dreamed of being a theology professor. Last year, I taught two classes at our local seminary. After observing and evaluating my classes, the dean told me I received some of the highest marks she has ever given. That teaching experience brought to mind Frederick Buechner's oft-quoted words about vocation: “The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep ...
from
http://feeds.christianitytoday.com/~r/christianitytoday/ctmag/~3/um1PorQ0W1g/unique-fomo-of-motherhood.html
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